A Well Lived Life
by Roxotaku
Summary: Kagome dies peacefully of old age. Can InuYasha live without her? Rated M for description of suicide.


A Well Lived Life

Disclaimer: InuYasha belongs to Rumiko Takahashi and her publishers. I make no money from all these dang stories that pop in my head.

InuYasha hated the smell of hospitals. The chemicals, medicines, and stench of sickness and dying flooded his nose and made him want to puke. With a weary sigh, he rested his elbows on the hospital bed and put his head in his hands, his long silver-white hair falling in a curtain around his face. His hair brushed the thin wrist of the person lying in the bed, and she stirred and tried to turn her head to look at him.

He was hundreds of years old, and in his prime. InuYasha looked like a man in his late twenties or early thirties, the same as his children. It had pissed him off when they went out as a family and people mistook Kagome as his mother. Especially in her time, where he used the latest in holographic cloaking devices to conceal his ears, fangs and claws. At least the wrist watch type device was less annoying then the caps he used to have to wear.

When Kagome had reached her fifties, her hair had turned as silver as InuYasha's. Their children, Michiko and Ichiro had kidded them that being married to their Dad all these years had finally made their Mom turn hanyou. Kagome and InuYasha had smiled and laughed with them. Now InuYasha wished for what felt like the thousandth time that Kagome had used the Shikon Jewel to become a hanyou like him.

"InuYasha," Kagome had said in that sweetly serious way of hers, "we are born into this world the way we are to fulfill our destiny in life. To change what I am is to change my fate. I believe you are a hanyou and I am a human for reasons greater than we will know until the day we die. It is not our place to change our ultimate destiny, our ultimate fate."

InuYasha had growled unhappily, unable to come back with a response that could match her conviction.

The movement on the bed in front of him broke InuYasha out of his maudlin thoughts. Kagome smiled up at him tremulously, the thin skin on her face wrinkling into fine lines. Gently, InuYasha took her hand in his, feeling the brittle bones so close to the surface under her skin, and looked anxiously into her face. They did not speak for a few moments, the only sound the beep from the machines that were keeping her alive. These machines could not stop what was happening to her, despite the fact the InuYasha felt she was still too young to die. No one could say why she was dying at the age of sixty-five, her body was just worn out. And they knew her time was running out now.

"Please, don't be sad," Kagome said her voice light and whispery but still sweet and full of love. "I think it's time to call the kids."

Exhaling a deep, ragged sigh, InuYasha said, "Phone Michiko and Ichiro."

The sleek device on his wrist said, "Connecting."

"Dad," came the sound of their daughter's voice, "is Mom awake?"

"Yes," InuYasha replied, "get your family and your brother's family together and come down…there isn't much time left."

"Okay, see you soon," Michiko replied.

"Connection terminated," The wrist device intoned.

InuYasha's eyes traveled from Kagome's face to the faintly glowing lavender orb that dangled from a chain at her neck; the Shikon Jewel, whole and purified. It had taken many, long hard years of their youth to finally defeat Naraku and complete it. InuYasha had given up the idea of becoming full youkai long before that, and left Kagome with the choice of what to do with it. It had never been used.

Kagome saw where his golden eyes were looking.

"You will keep your promise to me," Kagome said softly, "and pass it on to Michiko for safe keeping."

"Yes, you know I will," InuYasha replied, the corner of his mouth quirking up in a quick smirk.

Just then the door opened, and InuYasha turned around as his children and their families entered the room. Michiko, their daughter and eldest child came up to him first, and gave him a hug. Her long silver hair mingled with his as she bent her beautiful, golden-eyed face to kiss him on the cheek. Then she went and knelt by her mother's bedside. Michiko's husband, Koichi came up to him next, holding their four-year-old daughter Masami in one arm and holding the hand of their ten-year-old son, Akihiro. Gravely, Koichi bowed his head to his father-in-law, and InuYasha gave Masami a quick kiss before ruffling Akihiro's silver-white hair. The boy smiled hesitantly at his grandfather, fiddling with the device on his wrist that hid the ears, eyes and fangs he shared with both his Inu-hanyou father and grandfather.

"Go to your Mother," said Koichi to Akihiro, tugging him gently over to Michiko who turned and reached out to him to bring him to her side.

Behind Koichi, InuYasha and Kagome's son Ichiro and his family came into the room.

"Father," Ichiro said, taking and pressing InuYasha's hand.

InuYasha was pleased to see that Ichiro had tied back his unruly, long black hair in a ponytail in deference to his mother and how much she liked it that way. While Michiko was the spitting image of her father, although more delicate and without his ears and fangs, Ichiro looked like Kagome, with her warm brown eyes. Ichiro's wife Keiko, who was the only other full human besides Kagome, came in behind her husband, holding the hand of their six-year-old son, Sakutaro. Keiko walked up and pressed InuYasha's hand, giving her father-in-law an encouraging smile, and Sakutaro smiled shyly.

Soon everyone was gathered around Kagome's bedside. She turned her head a little smiling, her eyes full of love as she regarded her family.

"How are you feeling?" asked Michiko.

"Don't worry, I'm not feeling any pain," Kagome replied. "I'm just glad I am well enough to see you all one last time."

"Please don't say this is the last time," said Michiko, a sob catching in the back of her throat.

Her hand trembling a bit, Kagome raised it to caress her daughter's cheek.

"Please don't cry," Kagome said. "I have had a very well-lived life, and have no regrets."

Slowly, Kagome sought out the face of her son.

"Ichiro, come here," she said and lifted her other hand a fraction off the bed.

Ichiro came and took it, enfolding it reverently in both of his hands.

"You two must promise me to take care of your father when I'm gone," Kagome said.

InuYasha growled unhappily, frowning and crossing his arms.

"Ignore your father," said Kagome, the old twinkle coming into her eyes. "He always had a hard time recognizing what was good for him."

That made everyone laugh softly, and even InuYasha gave off being sour and smiled a little.

"Come everyone," Kagome said. "Come close to me."

Everyone gathered closer around the bed, and as she looked at each of them, they bent down and kissed her. The grandchildren were lifted so she could plant a dry, whisper-light kiss on their faces. Then she lay back, and closed her eyes, and they all realized that Kagome had saved the last of her strength to say a final farewell to her family. Kagome became pale, her lips colorless, and her breathing turned shallow.

Michiko could not help it, the sobs started to break out of her and Akihiro looked at his mother in concern. She turned to her son and put her arm around him reassuringly. Ichiro closed his eyes and bowed his head, his lashes wet. InuYasha bowed his head as well, his hair and bangs hiding the pain and tears in his eyes from his children and grandchildren. The only sound was the sound of the machines, beeping out their rhythm, until suddenly an alarm went off. Looking up, the family saw that Kagome was gone, a peaceful smile on her face. InuYasha rubbed the tears out of his eyes with the back of his hand and leaned over to give her one last, sweet kiss on the cheek. Then with trembling hands, he unclasped the necklace with the Shikon Jewel from around her neck.

"Your mother wanted me to give it to you," InuYasha said, taking Michiko's hand and placing it in her palm. "She believed you and Koichi would be able to keep it safe."

Michiko looked at it in wonder.

"But Dad, shouldn't you keep it?" Michiko said in awe.

"No, I refused it years ago," said InuYasha, "and the only thing I would have used it for, Kagome did not want. Now, it is only a reminder of what I once had and lost. It is better with you and Koichi."

Michiko turned wide eyes to her husband, who was also looking awe-struck as he gazed at the jewel in his wife's hand. His own parents had played a role in the completion of the jewel and defeat of Naraku, and he had been told about it. InuYasha took Masami from him, and Koichi took the necklace from Michiko's hand and put it around her neck. At this point, the medical crew arrived, and the family had to leave. For InuYasha, as he walked out the door, it felt like he was leaving his heart, the best and most important part of himself behind.

oOo

InuYasha, his children and grandchildren returned through the well to the Feudal era to bury Kagome. It was her wish to be buried under Goshinboku, the place she had first laid eyes on InuYasha.

"That was a day that changed my life forever," Kagome had told him. "The first time I saw you, my life was inextricably linked with yours from that day forward. So that is why I wish to be buried there."

Sango and her children and grandchildren came to pay their last respects to Kagome. She sat next to Koichi, who was also her son. Miroku had past away two years previously, also happy and at peace with the world. No one had told Sesshomaru about the funeral, but he showed up with Jaken and Rin just the same. The Lord of the Western Lands was composed and respectful during the ceremony, as befitted a taiyoukai of regal blood. Koichi was touched that he was there, since Sesshomaru was his father, but he knew better than to say anything to him like that. The villagers filed by, one by one, bowing and leaving flowers on her grave.

After everyone had left, InuYasha sat alone by the grave. He was still wearing his fire-rat, and as a breeze blew, it shifted his sleeves and lifted his long hair to cover his face. The large pile of colorful flowers started to blow about him, catching on him and the tree limbs above him. He just could not bring himself to leave her. The thought of going back to their house, that was slowly losing her scent without her presence, made his heart constrict. It felt like all the color was draining out of the world, and every minute that went by was slow and painful.

'How many more years must I live without her before I die?" he thought.

As a hanyou, he knew he could still live a long, long time. Would he have to see his children die as well? Michiko and Ichiro were only a quarter youkai. What would their life spans be? His grandchildren, Akihiro and Masami might live longer, since they had youkai blood on both their parent's sides. But it just was not the same as having his Kagome, his heart and soul, with him.

"Are you okay?" said Michiko, snapping him suddenly out of his reverie, and he looked up into her concerned face as she bent over him, hands on her knees.

"Yeah, don't worry about me Michiko," said InuYasha. "Go home to your family, they need you."

"I told Mom I would look after you," she replied softly.

InuYasha pushed his windblown hair out of his face and sighed, scratching his head. Then he looked up into Michiko's face and tried to smile.

"I'll be fine," he said, trying to make his voice reassuring. "Your Dad is still a pretty tough guy, you know."

"Oh yeah, tough guy, huh?" she said, and growled playfully, batting at him with her claws – which were the only outward sign of her youkai heritage besides her coloring.

InuYasha growled back, flexing his claws as if he was going to pounce. This was an old game of theirs from her childhood, and it momentarily distracted InuYasha from his pain.

"Okay Dad," she said with a small smile. "You know where to find me if you need me."

"Yeah, thanks," InuYasha replied and watched Michiko walk away.

The loneliness and despair closed around him like a shroud once InuYasha was alone again. He groaned and dug his claws into the dirt of Kagome's grave, and the tears he had kept hidden since she died began to spill over, unhindered, dropping on the dirt and flower petals.

Each day that passed became longer and harder to take for InuYasha. He ghosted about his lonely house, haunted by the memories that lingered there. Every night, he would dream of Kagome, only to wake and be alone. More and more, he stayed in bed, wanting to desperately stay in his dreams, with her.

Michiko and Ichiro did their best to look after their father. But InuYasha was as stubborn as ever, and turned them away every time they offered to come and stay with him a while. He became drawn and thin, and rarely spoke a word to those who came to see him, or those he saw on the rare times he left the house.

A week before the new moon, InuYasha decided he could not take it anymore. He formulated a plan, packed a bag, and went to see his brother. When he sat down with Sesshomaru, the taiyoukai listened to his brother silently and attentively, his brow furrowing just the slightest as he heard his brother's request.

"So, will you do it?" InuYasha asked.

A small sigh escaped Sesshomaru, and he bowed his head slightly in an affirmative.

"I'll see you in three days then," said InuYasha, and his lips quirking up in a quick smirk, he turned and left for home.

Three days later, it was the night of the new moon. InuYasha sat under Goshinboku, on top of Kagome's unmarked grave, his legs crossed and hands on knees, wearing his ageless fire-rat, his long black hair blending with the night. He had his favorite meal of ramen, and he moved the empty bowl aside. In its place, he put a dish with a tanto on it, and waited.

Out of the night stepped Sesshomaru and walked up to InuYasha's side. The hanyou turned to look at his older brother.

"I have come as you requested," said Sesshomaru. "Are you still going through with this?"

"Yes," said InuYasha. "Thank you for coming."

InuYasha bent down and picked up a folded piece of paper and handed it to Sesshomaru.

"Please give this to my children." InuYasha asked.

Sesshomaru bowed his head and took the paper from his brother's hand. Then InuYasha opened the ties on his haori and white under-shirt, pushing them away and leaving his chest and stomach bare. With a last deep sigh, he picked up the tanto and plunged in his stomach, and gritting his clenched teeth, dragged it through his stomach from left to right. With effort, he pulled the tanto out of himself, and bowed his head.

"Now," he whispered.

Sesshomaru drew Bakusaiga from its sheath and quickly beheaded his brother to save him from the agonizing and lingering death that would otherwise accompany committing Seppuku. Then he took several steps backward, cleaned his blade on the ground and sheathing it, went to find his niece Michiko.

When the blade quickly took his life, InuYasha felt himself float above his headless body. He watched as Sesshomaru left, and felt himself, his soul, rising steadily above the scene.

'What will happen to me now?' InuYasha's soul thought. 'Will I go to Kagome's heaven or some demon underworld?'

Suddenly, a bright white light appeared out of the darkness of the moonless night above him. It was like a star, only many times brighter and bigger, and its light shimmered and shifted, its beams reaching out towards him. As he regarded it in wonder, he heard a voice.

_Come_

The voice was warm and soothing and so familiar, and it emanated from the center of the brilliant, huge star.

_InuYasha_

_Come_

He was drawn towards the voice, and focused his soul to move towards the light. As he approached, it dawned on him who was speaking to him.

_Mother?_

_Yes, come, we are waiting for you._

Soon, he was drawn into the light, and it was all around him, and out of it came a face, getting more and more distinct the closer he got. The beautiful woman smiled at him with love and tenderness, and he recognized his mother. She raised ethereal arms to him and he went gratefully to her. Then she broke away and looked at him.

_Someone is waiting for you._

InuYasha turned as another figure emerged from the light. Looking as young and beautiful as the day they first met, and clothed in glowing white as was the soul of his mother, Kagome approached him.

_I should have known you would come to me._

InuYasha gasped and she opened her arms and embraced him, her eyes full of love and acceptance.

_I couldn't go on without you. If time could not keep us apart, did you think I would let death keep me from you?_

_No my love, nothing will keep us apart, ever again._

As the soul of Izayoi watched, the soul of her son and his soul mate Kagome faded together, until they merged. Finally, she knew her son had found the ultimate peace and happiness, as InuYasha and Kagome's two souls became one.


End file.
